How time flies!

We almost done with October and going into November. Wow, it always seem to amaze me how time flies when you are busy.

It has been crazy the past few weeks. Work has been crazy and church has been crazy also.

I also had do deal with some personal issues as of late.

Questioning things in my life and what I feel the Lord wants me to do.

I know that He wants me to be a missionary, a wife of one at that. Just not sure where to go from there. It like I am stuck in the middle of finishing training and going on to do what He has called me to do. Then I see people struggling and wonder, why Lord. I know we are not supposed to question him but I just wonder. There are trial that I go through and wonder why I am going through them. Then as I look back and praise God for what He has taught me and brought me to be a better person, a better Christian in the end.

Then I praise God for the friends that He has place to encourage me and not let me slip by the wayside. I guess the reason for this is because my heart is burden for someone tonight. I don't know the details but God knows and I just pray that in this hard time, they can see that God is still faithful and true and not to give up.

Well, its late and my bed is calling for me. Until next time, live life and let God move!

Love,

LaShawnda

Home going

Four years ago, my precious mom went home to be with the Lord. At the time, I didn't understand why. There were so many questions. Why did my mom had to get cancer and suffer three years for it? Why did it suck the life out of her? Why did He had to take my mom at such a turning point in my life. I was 21, two weeks short of my 22nd birthday when she went home.

Now four years later, I understand somewhat why I went through what I went through. Three years ago, the Lord brought Bro. Bruce Engelman and his family to take over the pastorate of my home church in Fort Worth. The family has gone through a lot in these past few years. About a year ago, his wife, Connie, found a lump on her neck which turned out to be a very aggressive and deadly tumor.

When I saw her last in May of this year, it seemed that she was going to defeat this. That odds there were against her were proven to be defeated by the Lord's grace. Then on Labor day, I found out she was in the hospital and that she was only given anywhere from 48 hours to two weeks to live. Well, tonight, she is now in the arms of our precious Lord and Saviour.

Though we are happy she is no longer suffering but there is a precious family that no longer has a wife and mother. As a child who watcher her mother died of cancer, I understand what the kids are feeling and going through. I just wish I can be home but I can't. Hopefully I can come home soon to spend some time there.

There are so many questions that I still ask. Why does cancer exist? Why has it claimed so many precious people I love and care about? I am tired of seeing and hearing of families suffer because a loved one got, fought and eventually died from cancer?

Tonight, as you get ready to go to bed, please say a prayer for the Engelman family and Baptist Temple. The next few days are going to be tough.

The Engelman Family

Bro. Bruce, Lindsey (Top)

Justin, Mrs. Connie, Jason (Bottom)

Love,

LaShawnda

The busy summer

Well, sorry I haven't posted in a while. It has been a busy summer so far for me. Work, church, trips, etc.

First off, work is going well. It gets crazy at times but in the end I go home and it doesn't come with me. Then I took a trip last weekend to Texas for the 4th. Had a blast and did not want to come back :(

This week is youth conference. Please pray for the Lord to work in the lives of the young people that will be there (and even the adults, we need hot preaching just as much as the young people do). I will be seeing some good friends this week and have a good time. This summer is flying by so quick. Before we know it, school will be starting again. Well, I need to finish getting ready for work. Bye for now.

Love,
LaShawnda :)

Summer of 2010

Well, summer is here in Oklahoma City. It has been a busy one for me :)

I started a new job at the daycare and I love it. The kids, I will admit, can be brats but you love them in the end. 40 hours a week with good pay. I love it and the best part, no weekends!

It allows me to help at the church, which is what I want to do!

I have been hanging out with the girls since the breakup and it has been precious times for me. I have been blessed with great friends to encourage and strengthen you! Talking with people, they are glad that things did not work out between me and Mick. A lot of ladies did not feel right about Mick. Most couldn't pin point it but they knew something was not right.

Looking back, I am glad myself of what the Lord brought me from. I learned alot but I also know, that I deserve better than what I had with Mick. Praise God for the miracle, learn from the mistakes and move on. I can safely say that, I have finally moved on!

Until next time....

Love,

LaShawnda

Once in a lifetime moment

Well I had an opportunity to meet Mark Harmon this past weekend. He plays agent Gibbs on NCIS. He played in a charity baseball game this weekend! So I had the chance to meet him, get an autograph and get a picture taken with him. He was very gracious!

I also started my new job this week. I really enjoy it. The kids are sweet and we have tons of fun :)

The daycare deals with DHS, so we have a lot to deal with. Today, I had my first parent gripe out. Her child plopped on the pillow and while doing that, she hit her head on the wall. Well, she got a bruise and her mother was mad. She pretty much telling me she is reporting to DHS. The other workers told me not to worry about it, she is rude anyways. The story was she is fighting the court system to get custody of her, so everything has to be perfect, even preventing normal childhood accidents. Well, I just shake it off and go on.

Well, I will let you go. I have a busy day tomorrow :)

Love,

LaShawnda

New beginnings

Well, it is amazing how the Lord answers prayers. I have been praying for a better job for a while. The Lord has finally opened a door and I am super excited about it.

I got an interview yesterday at a daycare. She offered me the job when I walked in. It is working with one year olds. What is even better, I start at least 9 an hour. Once I get my master teacher certification, it goes up to 12 an hour. I start Monday. It will be Monday thru Friday 9 to 6. I am very excited because it is better pay and more hours and it closer to home. The best part is I can still be involved in church and have the weekends off :)

The Lord is better to me than I deserve. Till next time, bye for now.

Love,
LaShawnda

The excitement in the month of May

When the month of May comes along, a lot of excitement happens during this month. Everybody is finishing up school for the year, and then come graduation. High school and college. This May was a month of first for me. First full year that I have been completely out of school (as in done for good, not for time being) and that I went to the OBC college graduation as an alumni.

Weird, it was but very proud of the friends that had followed behind me and finished the course. Also in May comes the unofficial start of summer, Memorial Day. As much as I love springtime, summer comes up second in favorite seasons (not because of the weather) but the relaxation of it. Now for the working adult, summer means nothing, just a hot part of the year. I just enjoy being able to go outside to swim and have fun :)

This summer is different for me. I have learned alot about myself in the past few months and now being single again, I am going to enjoy my freedom just a little bit longer. I do wish my prince would come but for now, I need to improve before he comes. Well, must go to bed, busy day ahead.

Love,

LaShawnda

Learning lessons and stepping stones

What do you learn when you go through life? What do you learn from a relationship?

Yesterday, me and Mick officially broke up. It was a descent break but a break up indeed. I have learned things about myself in the past six months that we were dating. Some mistakes, I know I will work hard to try to not to do again, and then some things I know what to do the next time things come around.

My heart does hurt but in time it will heal. I know that right now, God doesn't want me in a relationship. I also know that right now, its not meant to be for me and Mick to be together. Is there a possibility that we might get back together, probably not but I don't want to rule out God's plans.

I know what I need to do and that is to recover and move on. In time, God will heal my heart and I can move on to bigger and better things. Well, talk to you later.

Love

LaShawnda

Heartbreak

What does relationships with people can be hard? Why does my heart hurt so bad?

Mick wanted to break up last night. My mood swings are bad! He couldn't take it anymore. I ask if we can work things out. Then, we both agree to talk on Friday afternoon and see what happens. I have been crying over him since last night. Why, I like him or better yet, love him. I don't know if this is the point of no return. I have alot of people saying that if he is wanted to talk, he is wanting to work things out. Also he sent Vanessa to check up on me, they say he cares about me.

I don't know. My heart hurts and I want everything to be ok. I just have to remember what someone told me, "If this is the one God wants for you, it will work out"

Well, bye for now.

Love,

LaShawnda

Busy, busy, busy

Sorry that I have been so busy lately. These past few weeks have been hectic and no signs of slowing down soon.

You are wondering why I am posting this so late at night, early in the morning. Well, I am night person! Something that I never really got over since being in college. I tried to go to be early but I get distracted and well, its all over.

Getting ready for north south. You may also wonder what that is. Well, ever month at OBC, we have a school of the prophets. Its for the preacher boys to practice what they are learning when it comes to preaching. Well the last one of the school year, they make it big hence north vs. south. Well, I'm a southern through and through but I am dating a northern, and that a preacher boy! Well, guess what, I am sitting on the north side and going to the picnic with him. I think the sacrifice will be worth it.

Well, hate to keep it short, but its bed time. Until next time.....

In Christ,
LaShawnda :)

Meeting the parents pt.2

What can I say. It went very well. Mick's parents came in about noonish and met up with them about 1:30pm. He acts just like his dad! His dad was picking on me the whole day we were out. We took them to a sub place for lunch. It was pretty good.

From there, we went to the OKC bombing memorial, which I will tell you a little about that later! We went to Bricktown, walk around there, then we went to Lake Overholster (after a trip to Braums), and went ended up at On the Border for supper. We had a good time. Spent time with his parents and Mick. In the end, they like me :)

Something that struck me was when we went to the OKC Bombing memorial. By the museum, there is a wall where little kids painted pictures and so on expressing their thanks, sympathies, etc. One that I thought was touching was one that stated "The sky is still blue so the sun will shine through" I thought that was touching for the time and occurance of the bombing but our everyday life. We go through problems and circumstance and we ask why. In the end, the sky is still blue so the sun will shine through. It was a very touching statement from a little kid.

Well, I will post you later :) Love ya!

In Christ,

LaShawnda

Ex. 15:2

Easter :)

This Sunday everyone for the most part will be celebrating Easter. What does Easter mean ? For some, it means being off of work (unless you work retail!). For others, its getting together with family, having barbecues, easter egg hunts and if you come from a mostly Hispanic family like I did, family coming after you with confetti eggs.

Honesty, I didn't know what Easter meant till I got saved. I just know that it was a day you wear a frilly dress, do an easter egg hunt (hoping you get the egg with the ten dollar bill in it) and having a great cookout (if it wasn't rainy nor cold). Easter represented that to me. When I got saved, it changed. I'm not saying easter egg hunts are bad nor everything else but when we forget the Saviour that rose again to give us sinners victory, then Easter has lost its meaning.

So when you are spending time with your family, stuffing eggs for the hunt whether for your kids or bus kids, and eating some great food (if there is not a burn ban in your county), just remember Jesus. Remember what He went through so me and you if we accept Him, won't have to go through an eternity without Him. Have wonderful weekend and happy Resurrection day!

In Christ,

LaShawnda

Exodus 15:2

Meeting the parents

Well, this weekend is going to be an exciting weekend. First, it's because we are celebrating Easter on Sunday. Oh how I am grateful that my Lord rose again so we can someday rise again to glory! Another reason is, I MEET THE PARENTS. Now you may ask, are you nervous? Well, yeeeesssss!!!!!!

Mick assures me that his parents will love me but moms, you know how you are if you have a grown son. The girl he brings home, you would try to find a reason why she is not good enough for your baby boy! Some moms just get to the point and believe that no girl, no matter how sweet and wonderful she is, will never come close to being good enough for your son! Is that my worry, yes.

By God's grace, I will pass this test with flying colors! I hope that the meeting will go very well and that his parents will like me. Also my prayer is that they stay for church on Sunday. Why you may ask. As you see, Mick is like me, he did not come from a Christian home and his parents till this day are not saved. He has tried to witness to them but has not had any luck with both of them. I pray that my testimony and personality will a least be a good witness of Christ' love to them.

Once I go through this weekend, I have only one other worry concerning my relationship with Mick. It is him passing the test when he meets the Hollars. Bro. Mickey, not so much, Mrs. JoAnn, yes!

Well, done with my short and sweet post for today. See you soon. Love ya!

In Christ,

LaShawnda

Exodus 15:2

What I don't understand

Well, I realize more and more that I am woman. You may read this and think, NO DUH!!!!!! I never really considered myself a girly girl. I didn't have a problem getting dirty if it meant getting the job done. I do have a fit if I break my nail but I get over it usually!

I realize it when I get mad and instead of getting mouthy, I get quiet, try to get out of there, cool off (usually means walking or crying) and see what happens! I don't like confrontation and I don't like fights (Mostly because of what I dealt with growing up and working hard not to be that)

Well, this came when this morning when I found out my boyfriend cross that line. We know which line. The line of privacy when you discuss something that you thought was supposed to be between you and him and it was supposed to be it. Well, he told his roomie who used it jokingly to another buddy's mom that we were breaking up. Now I don't have a problem with joking but I do have a problem when my personal issues and conversations have been compromised.

Now, I know I am no better that I am posting this as my latest blog entry but I just don't understand why some men have to tell everything to everybody! I am one that likes to keep my private life private. If I have a problem and I go to someone, I expect in confidence that it would not be shared with the whole universe. Then I remembered the times that I was told something and I might have blabed about it to someone else, and realized that I should have kept my mouth shut. The law of sowing and reaping is once again proven true in my life!

I pray that me and Mick can get this resloved with no hurt feelings. I would go talk to him but tonight is the School of the Propehts and he is getting ready to preach. I don't what to burden him right before he gives a message that the Lord gives him to give to us!

I have a lot to learn about a dating relationship that might could lead to a marriage relationship! What I have learned so far.....

1. You are liking this person for who they are. You have to accept the good, the bad, and the ugly
2. Be yourself. Don't try to be something that you are not
3. Communicate, communicate, communicate. You can't read his mind and he definitely can't read yours! (Something that I am still learning)
4. Have fun. If you can't afford to go on dates, enjoy the little times you have together

Well, I am done with my soapbox for today. I feel better now that I got this off my chest, its now going to him and getting things right! Well love ya!

In Christ,
LaShawnda
Exodus 15:2

First Time for Everything

Well, I thought that I would never do nor start this but I did it. I started a blog, for what purpose, I don't know. I just thought it would be something neat to do. Share my thoughts, worries, prayer request, new interests in my life and anything else worth your time reading.

Just to up to date on my life, I graduated from Oklahoma Baptist College May 2009. I currently reside in Oklahoma City. I just work to pay bills and help out at church when needed. I get the chance to go to college chapel when I don't work and hear great preaching. I still get to help on the best bus route ever, bus 7. It is the one that goes to the NW side of OKC.

I also started dating a guy named Mick Brown. He is 30 years old and is surrendered to evangelism in Australia. We have been together for six months (crazy isn't it). It has been fun with a few lessons learned (First dating relationship for me and first Christian dating for both of us). We are just praying for God's Will to be done in our lives. He is a freshman at OBC this year and is wanting to get done in three years. If you can remeber to pray for him, I would appreciate it.

Well, it's getting late and I need sleep. I will be back ocassionally to post later. Love ya!

In Christ,
LaShawnda
Exodus 15:2 :)